


I don't have bones?!

by liighty



Category: Splatoon
Genre: Crack, F/F, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Hero Mode (Splatoon), Hugs, Lesbian Cephalopods (Splatoon), M/M, Marie (Splatoon) is a little shit, No Smut, Other, Pearl (Splatoon) Swears, Post-Octo Expansion DLC, Post-Splatoon 2, Sharing a Bed, Squidbeak Splatoon, but pure
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2020-03-03
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:46:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21821653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liighty/pseuds/liighty
Summary: Agent 4 finds out she doesn't have bones
Relationships: Agent 3 & Agent 4 & Agent 8 (Splatoon), Agent 3/Agent 8 (Splatoon), Agent 4 & Marie (Splatoon), Agent 4/Marie (Splatoon), Callie & Marie (Splatoon), Cap'n Cuttlefish/DJ Octavio, Marina/Pearl (Splatoon), it's more platonic, lmao - Relationship
Comments: 14
Kudos: 34





	1. Character Introductions ig

AIGHT

this is gonna be really bad

but YOU KNOW WHAT?

I DON'T CARE ANYMORE

CHARACTER INTRODUCTIONS- START

* * *

  * **Pearl Hime**
    * Chaos _QUEEN_
    * Cusses too much
    * Really small, will vore your toes if you insult her height
    * Tiny-ass lesbian
    * Literally has NO FUCKING CHILL
    * Plays too much Smash Ultimate
    * ~~vores toes~~
    * She/Her
    * 21 (Apparently?)
  * **Marina Ida**
    * Order _also Queen? idk_
    * Kind of Insecure? sort of?
    * Tall-ass motherfucker
    * HUUUGE fan of the Squid Sisters (But who isn't, honestly?)
    * Will hurt you if you insult her Pearlie
    * Homoromantic Asexual
    * She/Her
    * 18 (Apparently)
  * **Agent 8**
    * Pure Bean
    * Not cultured (Don't worry; Agent 4 is fixing that as we speak)
    * HUUGE fan of the Squid Sisters (But who isn't, honestly?)
    * ADORES Off The Hook (Just Like Everyone Else)
    * Thinks Agent 3 is the coolest squid on the planet
    * Can actually get really scary when upset
    * Obsessed with Crusty Seanwhiches
    * Omnisexual, too pure to fuck ngl
    * She/Her
    * 16
  * **Agent 3**
    * Pretends to be an edge lord but really isn't
    * Her mood is literally "Too Tired for This Shit" or "Fuck You" 24/7
    * Shorter than Agent 8, taller than Agent 4
    * Closeted fan of the Squid Sisters
    * ~~addicted to mountain dew and doritos~~
    * ~~veteran weeb~~
    * Really Bad with emotions
    * When asked about Agent 8, she'll respond with "Agent 8 is pretty rad ig"
    * Resents the fact that Agent 4 is older than her
    * polysexual
    * She/Her
    * 17
  * **Agent 4**
    * mEmER
    * Originally spent too much time looking at memes and investigating Lil Judd to do music
    * Big fan of Off The Hook
    * aDORES the Squid Sisters
    * Also addicted to doritos and mountain dew
    * Likes to annoy Marie, but is definitely crushing
    * Good friends with Callie, but her favorite squid sister is still Marie
    * BIG pan
    * She/Her
    * 19
  * **Marie Cuttlefish? (I think idk)**
    * Sarcastic piece of shit
    * Acts like she doesn't like Agent 4, really does
    * Tired mom friend
    * Thinks Off the Hook is pretty rad
    * BIG BI
    * She/Her
    * 19
  * **Callie Cuttlefish (I think? idk)**
    * Almost as Chaotic as Pearl
    * Younger of the two Squid Sisters
    * Is actually a pure bean who must be protected at all costs
    * very emotional
    * Best friends with Agent 4, wants her to get together with Marie
    * ace/aro
    * She/Her
    * 18
  * **Craig Cuttlefish**
    * Rap God
    * Ridiculously old
    * Respects wamen
    * A boomer, but he's surprisingly chill
    * Bi (He had a wife- duh- but she's kind of dead and his relationship with Octavio has changed to a more platonic one)
    * He/Him
    * 130 years old
  * **DJ Octavio**
    * Is actually a big baby
    * More of a boomer than Craig, but still kind of chill
    * After his imprisonment in the snowglobe and some chitchat with Marina, he's learned to get along with Inklings
    * Closeted gay
    * He/Him
    * 132 years old
  * **Lil Judd**
    * a serial killer




	4. Author's note: I haven't even started the fic yet and I have an author's note already? smfh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I STFG I WILL FINISH THIS IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO

I totally forgot this existed. I need to pay attention to this, istg

However, writer's block SUCKS. So, in the meantime, I will write drabbles or one shots or whatever in my commission work, so feel free to check that out if you want to see some ACTUAL GODDAMN SPLATOON FANFICTION <https://archiveofourown.org/works/22991113/chapters/54966985>

thank you for your time


End file.
